We all have encountered superb speakers and not so great ones. So have I. Just for the sake of comparison, I once paid equal attention to both the types of presenters (I know it’s difficult) and later summarized the important action points in both. I was surprised to find that both of them had great ideas, in fact some of the ideas were common! The difference I realized was just the way ideas were conveyed. Just the way the presenter communicated made me want to keep listening to her or go off to sleep.

There are number of ways to improve command over speech. Here are some tried and tested techniques to gain control.

Voice energy has three sub qualities, volume, pitch and pace which we’ve all heard about. Now here are ways to control them.

Volume

Just the volume can determine whether you come across as boring and timid or overbearing and bossy. Neither of the extremes are good for a presenter. Strike the note between the two. The optimum decibel level (unit to measure volume) is 7-8 dB. You and I don’t have access to a machine that measures it. Try this instead, say the same sentence in different volumes, starting from barely audible to screaming. Get your friend to listen to you and tell you at what point on the continuum do you sound confident and assertive. In case you are presenting to a large group, do not strain your voice by constantly screaming, get a mic instead.

Pitch

Pitch is a quality difficult to define, but we know it as shrillness of voice. Women have a naturally higher pitch as compared to men. Our pitch automatically increases when we get excited or angry. Very often our voice gets tired when we are presenting a topic close to our heart. That’s because of the excitement, we continue to speak at a pitch higher than our natural one. I use a simple trick to resume my natural pitch when I feel my voice getting tired. I take a break, close my mouth and say to myself, Uh huh…uh huh hi…uh huh bye…uh huh hello…uh huh people…uh huh executive education….uh huh presentation about executive education. There you are! The last sentence you said was in your natural pitch. Go ahead continue the same pitch in a more relaxed voice.

Pace

Everybody’s processing speed is different. Make it simple for people to understand and absorb what you are saying, by controlling your speed or pace of talking. Most of us are not aware when we speak too fast. Try this, go back to the beginning of the article and read a few paragraphs with pause after every word. Force yourself to stop for a second after every word. Refrain from pronouncing words which are joined, together. For e.g. don’t say “don’t”, say “do” (wait for a second) “not”. The more difficult you find it, the more you need to train your voice. Get comfortable with the pauses. Also after covering each main topic, stop for a few seconds, even if the pause is uncomfortable. Give people time to absorb the idea and ask questions if any.

Train your voice with these techniques and improve the quality of your presentations. These will require some practice to become a habit. But effectively applied, these techniques can make the presentations more comfortable for you and more interesting for your audience.

Even experts need help while preparing for a big presentation. A great presentation can impress people, make or break deals and showcase your confidence and communication skills. Good oratory skills are important, but prior preparations also have an important role. These minor preparatory steps help you to calm your nerves and stabilize your stage fright. For a more effective public speaking performance, you need to prepare both your mind and body to function smoothly.

Five things to do before presentation:

1. Stimulate the first minute

The first minute of any presentation paves the path for your main presentation. You can practice this minute in your mind to give an idea how the presentation will start. Do this simulation in front of your mirror in the privacy of your home. Doing this activity will help you to look into the audience confidently without any hesitation. You can create an impactful first impression when you begin a presentation through this activity. Practice your introduction in fluent English to help you get a good start

2. Survey the presentation room

It is preferable to survey the room where you are going to give the presentation before hand. This will give you some time to be familiarized with the environment where you are supposed speak. You can check out the electronics, seating arrangement and audiovisual facility. You need to visit the place early and make yourself comfortable with the location. You can minimize the number of unexpected glitches due to this activity.

3. Drink warm water with lemon

Lemon helps to clear the throat and get rid of mucus, thus helping you get a sharp voice. You should take care to avoid cold drinks, dairy products or carbonated beverages. Also, while giving presentations, you should make sure that you have a glass of water within reach. This activity will also help you to prevent dry mouth.

4. Take standing position five minutes before

When you stand, the body goes into active mode and your energy levels rises. The sitting position is often considered to be passive and an inactive one. If you abruptly get up to speak, you will be hesitant and your confidence level will be low. When you stand up beforehand, you are gathering up your energy and preparing yourself for that challenging presentation.

5. Restroom option

It is better that you answer the call of nature before the presentation to avoid unwanted breaks. Some people react to panic or stress situations with the need to go to the restroom. Hence, avoid taking unwanted chances and finish your washroom business well before hand.

The above five tips will help you deliver a power packed presentation. Use these tips in collaboration with your English speaking skills to make a good impact. Improve your spoken English skills with the help of an online English tutor and continuous practice.

The use the slide is basically as a presentation tool, not the presentation itself. Therefore, you need to differentiate between the role of the slides as a tool and your role as a presenter.

As a tool, a slide is needed to explain something that would be quite difficult if you have to be explained with words. It is like the popular idiom that says an image can represent a thousand words. Slide also helps provide a summary of what has been presented, so it is understood by the audience more easily. In addition, through the slides, you can give an illustration of a trend, comparison, and the emphasis that are rather difficult if you have to use words.

There are some basic principles that must be met when making slides. If this is done, then the slide will carry out its function as a tool, not as a nuisance that distracts the audience’s attention from the presentation itself. Here are those principles:

1. Simple

The simple and right slide is the best. With a slide like this, you have much flexibility to give explanations. The more complicated a slide, the audience will need more extra time just to understand the slide. Your difficulty to explain the slide could also be such a presentation confounding.

2. Need or not?

For each sheet of slides that will be created, ask yourself whether the slide is necessary? Is the slide and the other one can be merged? Does this slide can be replaced with a short explanation to the audience? Consider these questions to make the slides that are truly effective and efficient.

3. The background and font readability

With a diverse background of the slides that you can use and thousands of fonts that are available, there are times when you are tempted to experiment with various options. It will be okay if a combination of background and font used is readable by the audience. It is suggested for you to use a dark blue background with yellow font with good contrast reasons and not quickly tiring eyes. You can also use a light-colored background with dark text.

For font selection, it is recommended to only use two fonts in a slide, and even in your overall presentation. The more fonts you use, the more tired the audience sees them.

Besides, too many fonts can make the audience confused about the consistency of your presentation and the relationship between one slide with the next slide. A good font for presentation is the one that does not use a lot of decoration on the end of the letter, such as: Arial, Verdana, Trebuchet. Decorative fonts can be used as a slide title or supporting texts which are not the body text.

4. Maximum seven lines of text

If you explain some of the items in the format of bullet points, make sure there are not more than seven in a slide show. A large amount will make the font smaller, so it is difficult to read.

5. Pictures, graphs, and diagrams

In the presentation, you will rely on your own presentation skills, assisted by the presentation slides as a companion. The great power of slide is it can explain something with pictures. Indeed, a proper image can represent a thousand words if it should be explained. Therefore, take advantage and use pictures, graphs and diagrams.

The images you use in the slides should be relevant to the content. By using the images, do not distract your audiences’ attention when they are confused to relate the images that appear with the content of your presentation.

Using graphic itself also needs attention. There are different kinds of graphs starting from the bars, pie charts, line, and their combination. The selection of the correct graph will give a huge impact on your listeners to understand the content of your presentation.

Bar graph is the most common and most suitable graph to explain the growth within a certain time, while pie charts are suitable to explain the comparison of the proportion. The line graph illustrates the trend for comparison of multiple items at once.

Meanwhile, the diagram is very helpful when you explain the steps of work processes and their relationship. You can use this to facilitate the audience to understand the difficult part of the presentation.

6. Use quite color combination

Another advantage of slide is that you can use different color options. Use several colors that have quite contrast, and are consistent in your slides. Do not use different colors on every slide because it is very annoying and makes you look unprofessional.

In this age of technology, we may over-think many things that are really quite simple. One example is a technique I use with Post It Notes. I use this tool all the time in developing presentations that will easily engage the audience and leave a lasting impression.

Many recognize this as a story board, one that is easy to amend and is totally portable. I use it to prepare all my presentations, and even review and update my old ones. I call it “Presentation Mapping.”

Here’s what you need: a package of small multi-colored sticky notes, and a manila file folder, either letter size or for bigger projects, legal size. Label your folder with the presentation name and start to work. First, chart out the main topics or key points you want to cover. Each topic gets its own sticky note color. Put them at the top of the open folder. Plan on using both the left and right sides of the open folder. I like using manila folders because I can fold them up and carry them around with me. I work from home, but often use coffee shops to catch a few minutes of work time when I am away.

With my primary topics in one color running along the top of the open folder, I start to add content using a different color running down each column created with the topic title. I find it moves along quickly. I use a blue colored sticky note for the “through line” or Big Idea, attached to a space to the side. This way I make certain every main point will tie in the Big Idea. This keeps me on subject, and not going down any “rabbit trails” during my presentation. The Big Idea is carried throughout the presentation. If it is a teaching lesson, I put down the objectives for the students to be sure these don’t get lost in the shuffle.

In your presentation you might want to high-light what is at stake for your audience if they don’t buy into your Big Idea. Make that sticky note red. You can also make a main point stand out with a short illustrative story. Make that sticky note blue. If you need to you can just pick up a column of a major point and reposition it in your presentation. You want it in a logical order that is easy to follow by the audience. They will be anticipating your next point, and you don’t want to redirect their thinking. Create drama by putting your main points in a meaningful order. I like to think of it as a crescendo (as in music) building to a final impactful point. When different elements to your presentation are in different colors, changing the order is quick and easy. Now you are ready to draft your presentation from your final mapping.

I carry around a small stack of sticky notes, so when I have a great inspiration and I don’t have that particular presentation map with me, I write it out on a Post It Note and transfer it to that presentation map when I get back to my home office. The presentation mapping process is always under construction, and I can always find ways to improve it.

There you have it. High tech at its simplest put to work creating powerful presentations. I frequently work with speakers helping them develop their presentations that will resonate with their audiences. This simple tool is one of the most helpful ideas I can pass on. Good luck, and speak well!

Sometimes you have to do things in reverse. If you’re trying to understand how to create great 60-second presentations. You may just have to first understand what not to do when you’re presenting instead. This is part four of a four part series discussing common mistakes made during 60-second presentation. In this last of my four part series, I will discuss five more mistakes that are common from my top 20 list of mistakes. These last five complete your arsenal of mistakes to avoid. Armed with this knowledge you will be able to avoid the pit falls so many networkers make. Each article in the series stands alone in teaching you what not to do. However, I do encourage readers to go back and read the first three parts of this series if they haven’t done so. With all four parts combined, you will be able to avoid 99 percent of all the mistakes networkers make when performing their 60-second presentation. Avoiding these mistakes bring you that much closer to presentation nirvana. It also brings more referrals and the opportunity to make a lot more money. So without any further delay, let’s get started.

Common mistake #5 Being asleep at the wheel

I’m always amazed when people hurt their credibility because they are not paying attention at a networking event. We are there to network and give our message so that others can bring us referrals or buy our products. So why is it that someone in the room will not be ready when it’s their turn? Not only are they not ready, they don’t even have a clue that it is their turn! The cure for this is to “be here now,” so to speak. Pay close attention to what each player’s is saying. If you’re following what they are saying, you will notice that the turn is coming your way. Stop fiddling with your cell phone or iPad and get ready. You only get one chance to look good when it’s your turn.

Common mistake #4 Using acronyms

We live in a world that loves and hates acronyms at the same time. Acronyms are great for saving time and space when speaking, reading and writing. However, this is only true if you know what the acronym means. Nothing makes a person feel left out (or worse, stupid) like not knowing what someone meant. Using acronyms is an easy way to make your audience feel “NOT OK”. It will also keep you from getting any referrals. Make sure you don’t use any acronyms; they are bad for your 60-second presentations and bad for business.

Common mistake #3 Cramming 3 minutes into 60 seconds

I can always tell when someone is either new or unprepared to deliver a 60-second presentation. The presenter will rattle off a long laundry list of products or service they provide. You will often notice that they are in a rush. This really becomes apparent when the timekeeper starts to flag them with the 10 seconds left signal and they abruptly stop, then close out their presentation without asking for a referral. Cramming is analogous to try to stuff 10-pounds of rice into a 5-pound bag.

A simple way to fix this problem is #1; prepare by creating several commercials of varying lengths and #2; stay focused on a single subject. Trying to tell your audience everything you do in 60-second is like trying to fill your drinking glass and forgetting to stop pouring once its full. Don’t come across as if you’re reading a disclaimer; take your time by using strategic pauses and only talk about one product or service in any one 60 second presentation. Focus will improve the power and clarity of your message. It will also make it much easier to stay within the 60-second time frame.

Common mistake #2 Not asking for a referral

It’s quit common to see networkers focus their message entirely on the feature and benefits of their product or service. They will give a wonderful example of how they are different and better than the competition and forget to tell us who they are looking for. The easiest way to help your audience find you a referral is to tell them exactly who you are looking for. Telling your listeners what you do for a living won’t get you there! To fix this mistake do what Steven Covey calls “begin with the end in mind”. When creating your 60-second presentation, start with the “persons name or profile” you will be asking for. Then create the rest of your presentation with all the parts of your 60-second commercial. Make sure that all the other elements in your presentation leads your audience to bringing you that referral.

Common Mistake #1 Forgetting to empower your listeners

Never make your audience do more work than they want to do. If you’re asking for a referral, remember that 90% of your audience just wants to recognize your request when the opportunity presents itself. However, this is not enough to help your audience take the next step. You want them to introduce you personally. You must tell them how to get your foot in the door. You have to give them specific conversation starters to get you into their (clients/friends), conversation otherwise; they will not act on your behalf. Your referral partners need to know exactly what to say and what to do other wise they will do nothing.

My current 60-second presentations ends with, “Give them my card and ask when I can call.” I also like to ask my listeners to mention any specials I currently have or to talk about how my product/service help someone else in their industry. Other things you can say include directing your referral partners to give out your brochure, website address or to set up a lunch date for the three of you. By being specific and telling your referral partners who to look for, what to do and say, you will greatly increase the chances that your referral partners will act on your behalf. Not being specific will most likely ensure that your audience does nothing. Empower your listeners and get more referral.

This article covers the last five common mistakes from my top 20 list. The 20 common mistake covered in this series constitute the bulk of the most common mistakes made by both beginners and seasoned word of mouth veterans. To avoid making the mistakes listed in this article follow these fixes. Make sure you’re mentally and emotionally present when attending a networking event. Avoid using acronyms; most people don’t know what they mean anyway, and it’s a fast way to lose your audience. Prepare a focused 60-second presentation covering only one subject. Focus improves your message and increases your chances of getting a response. Always ask for a specific referral and always use empowering phrases that tell your audience how to get your foot in the door.

I hope this series has been useful to you and your business. If you can think of other common, (or some not so common) mistakes made during 60-second presentation let me know about them. Be sure to leave your comments and tell me your thoughts.

That’s my opinion, I welcome yours.

Negotiation is an extremely important skill to have and becoming a Ninja negotiator can give you all that you want in life and more. The most attractive partner, the best job, the most lucrative business deals and much more. You do not have to be good looking to attract a beautiful partner. You do not have to be rich to get the choicest opportunities. What you need is simply a few skills.

Ninja negotiation is the art of yielding before you push. Negotiation is energy that goes back and forth until there is agreement. By negotiating, ninja style, you avoid one of the most common problems when negotiating with others. Namely, the stale mate, where neither party get’s what they want. Or even worse, the compromise, where each party gets a little of what they want but nothing more.

The latter is the “grown up” method that most people seem to think is most fair. The point of ninja negotiation is to avoid the stale mate or the compromise and get exactly what you want and need. Ninja negotiation is about yielding to the other but using timing to convince them of the virtues of your proposal.

So, like a good Zen Buddhist, you are patient. That is the key. most people get impatient to resolve a negotiation because negotiation is uncomfortable. But if you are prepared to yield without committing, you create a void in the energy field. This void is then filled by the other party and typically, the energy is a return in full of what they “took” When you yielded, but without committing and then delayed, you created that vacuum.

This never fails. Create the vacuum by pulling back and watch your adversary come running. They simply can’t help it! Just remember this rule as a Ninja negotiator: after the deal has been talked out and you yielded without committing, pull back and create the energy vacuum – the first to talk loses!

I wish that there was some sort of black magic potion or single scientific study that I could point to in order to justify what I’m about to tell you, but there isn’t. So here it goes: never be the first to make a concession on a MAJOR issue.

Why Should We Take The Hard Line Here?

Concessions are a part of every sales negotiation. In fact we’ve spent a lot of time talking about the 5 ways that sales negotiators can use concessions to get what they want. Now all of a sudden it looks like we’re doing a 180 and telling you to not give in. What’s up with that?

The big difference here is that we’re focusing on the MAJOR issues – not the 100′s of other, smaller issues that come up during any sales negotiation. It’s on these issues and these issues alone that you need to take the hard line.

It’s All About The Experiments

This is one of those things that has been the subject of a lot of on-the-job experimentation. What each of the studies has shown is that the side of the table that makes the first concession on an important issue always seems to end up doing poorly. The reasons are not completely clear, but it appears as though the side of the table that made the concession then finds themselves on the defensive during the rest of the negotiation.

How Can You Use This Information?

Knowing that giving in first on major issues is a bad idea, you need to adjust your negotiating strategy so that you don’t deadlock over these issues. This means that BEFORE you allow the sales negotiation to get to a major issue, make sure that you discuss several smaller issues. On these issues, make the first concession if it is appropriate. This will buy you good will with the other side that you’ll be able to play on when you reach a major issue.

Final Thoughts

When you stand firm on the major issues you’ll be sending a message to other side that perhaps their expectations are too high and they should start to expect to lower them. Since you won’t be giving in first, you won’t have to be on the defensive for the rest of the sales negotiations and you’ll be all set to close better deals and close them quicker.

The right mental attitude will do wonders for anyone involved in the negotiation process, be it sales negotiation, contract negotiation, or even business debt negotiation. Of all of the negotiation tactics, having a positive attitude and outlook is the premier trait of an effective negotiator.

The mental attitude of a person affects every decision they make, every word they say, and every action they take. A person’s attitude colors, in an almost intangible way, the manner in which things are done, so that the person receiving the action, or hearing the words, is more convinced by the attitude than the actual action or words themselves. You cannot divorce attitude from action, verbal or physical.

Just as when a parent disciplines a child, and (in love) is compelled to instill pain and disappointment in that child, she is showing far more in her attitude than in the action of discipline, and children know inherently that parents who discipline evidence their love most completely. Though they hate the discipline, the child knows they are loved because of the discipline.

It is the attitude that counts.

In contrast, when a salesman approaches you with a backslap and forced laughter and tells you because you remind him of his uncle and he just thinks so much of you that he is going to give you a deal that might get him fired, do you believe him? No matter what he says, or what he offers, you feel down deep inside that his attitude is disingenuous, and false. The offer appears great, the words are right, but his attitude is as phony as a 3 dollar bill.

It is the attitude that counts.

The first element of attitude in successful negotiation tactics is belief. If the negotiator believes a deal is possible, it probably is. If he can convince the other side that it is possible, it almost absolutely is. Belief in success is the first step toward success.

How does one arrive at this belief? While it might be difficult to believe something with no grounds on which to believe it, if you have created an atmosphere of probably success with your words and actions you will be more likely to believe that success a reality, and that belief will affect both yours and the opposing side’s attitude. This study of attitude and belief gets awfully close to the chicken and the egg paradox: (which one comes first?) However, you can start the process by deliberate and progressive steps. Here they are:

1. Show physical expressions of your positive attitude. This means smile, take on a casual pose, and keep your hands open and relaxed. People will figure out your true demeanor over time, but you can start them in the right direction by showing them you are happy and hopeful right away. The other side will watch your face, your posture, and your hands to try to guess where you are mentally. Help them. Let them know you are there to make a mutually beneficial deal.

2. Ease into the mechanics of the deal at hand. People want to feel that they are dealing with a person, maybe a little like themselves. If they have children, they might want to hear about yours. If they are sports fanatics, they might want to know if you support the same teams. This is where you can allow them to learn about you, or better yet, you can learn about them. Most people will talk long before they will listen. It’s the human way. Use it. Let them talk. Let them tell you whatever they want to tell you, and be genuine and really listen to them. You put yourself in a position of strength when you choose to listen instead of talk.

3. Express your belief that both you and they will do the right thing. This is crucial. You absolutely must reveal to them that you believe they will make a fair deal, like you. People are funny creatures, and one of the most interesting things about humans is what motivates them to action. I believe children are the best teacher of all, in business and everything else.

Tell a child you believe he will do the wrong thing, make the wrong choice. You know something? Chances are a hundred to one he will do just as you said. But tell a child you believe he will make the right choice, do the right thing, and the odds are about the same he will do just that: the right thing. Why? It is because people follow expectations set for them by others, whether they realize it or not.

Experience will show you that your attitude of a positive outcome will heavily influence the other side’s actions to bring about that positive outcome. You do this by:

* Expressing that you will strive to achieve an agreement that is beneficial to both of you, and you believe they will do the same.

* Expressing that you understand their concerns and fears, and you believe they can understand yours.

* Expressing that you share common ground with them, be it values, goals, and desired outcomes.

To be a successful negotiator you must apply effective negotiation tactics. A positive mental attitude will flavor your words and actions and bring out the same in the other side of a negotiation. Positive attitude breeds positive action, and people cannot help but be affected by the genuine, positive and hopeful attitude of another.

Even if it means making a concession.

Have you ever gazed vulnerably at a manila folder crammed full of mortgage documents that you are about to sign and wondered if you could have gotten a better deal? Almost everyone who owns a house has had this feeling before; this is usually because they didn’t take time to effectively negotiate a better price with the lender. Most people fail to negotiate because they feel uncomfortable discussing the subject matter or the uneasiness that accompanies negotiating. For the most part, people hate confrontation and would rather pay a little higher price than have to negotiate.

Studies show that most borrowers will return to the same lender time and again, even if they know that they can get a slightly better deal elsewhere. This is to avoid having to negotiate and the fear of getting hammered by an unknown lender. Consumers could save hundreds or thousands of dollars each year by employing some simple negotiating tactics throughout the year. Some examples of where you could save money are your mortgage, car, life insurance, tires, mechanic, electrician, plumber and more. By simply taking an extra step to negotiate you could probably save enough money for your next vacation.

Negotiating doesn’t have to be a grind and it doesn’t have to be tacky, it has to be planned. Much like chess, when you know how your opponent will move next, the game is yours. One strategy for successful negotiating is to simply set up a higher authority when making these purchases. This is called “good guy, bad guy” gambit and is commonly used in the car business. I’m not advocating that you behave as a car salesman does, just merely use the same gambit. Think about it, car salesmen have been using this tactic for years and you have probably never been aware of it.

Have you ever noticed that the car salespeople are your “friend” when you’re buying a car? It’s the “mean manager” that won’t cut your price or give you more money for your trade and the salesperson is on your side. Before you know it, you’re asking your salesperson to negotiate for you with the stingy manager to cut the price. If the sales manager says “No” you’re not angry at the poor sales person, after all, he’s on your side.

This is called “good guy bad guy”, the salesperson is the good guy and his sales manager is the bad guy. The truth is, when your salesman scurries off to “go to battle” for you with the “mean manager”, he’s actually talking about the weather or the Braves game with him. Both he and the manager have a vested interest in you paying more for the car. The reason salespeople use the good-guy bad-guy gambit is to avoid tension and to keep the consumer’s ego from spoiling the negotiation.

Most consumers are inexperienced negotiators and have the tendency to draw a line in the sand early in the negotiations, i.e.” If you don’t give me this price or rate I will not do business with you. This calls the consumer’s ego into play, and usually kills the deal. This is why most people that try to negotiate a mortgage or car purchase will usually begin with company “A”, throw out an unreasonable offer, have it rejected, and eventually buy the product at company “B” for the same price that company “A” offered.

In the history of negotiating, man’s ego has killed more deals than the price ever has. To avoid having each other’s ego spoil your next deal, try setting up a higher authority who is calling the shots for you on the purchase, i.e. your husband, wife, mother, father and so on. A higher authority is a fictional person that you create that has the power to say “yes” or “no” to you being able to purchase the product. The higher authority will be the “bad guy” and you will be the “good guy”. You may feel a little emasculated by doing this however, you’re trying to save money, not impress the salesperson with your negotiating skills.

You should begin by telling the salesperson something along these lines, “My (uncle) told me to use your company to get a good deal on (insert product or service). This gives the salesperson the impression that you are naïve and you are serious about doing business. Follow up this with something like, “I have never bought one of these (products or services), can you help me get a good deal? At this point the salesperson should be salivating. Since you are “inexperienced”, all of your offers and counter offers during the negotiations will come from your “uncle” who is the family expert in these matters.

Now you can let your “uncle” throw out the first offer without bruising anyone’s ego. The offer should be slightly on the ridiculous side, you can say something like this: “my “uncle” told me that I shouldn’t pay more than (blank) for a (blank) is that about right”? After asking for the ridiculous price sit back and watch, you have just put your salesperson “in check”. The salesperson will most likely respond to your “uncle’s” offer with, “Your uncle is crazy”, there’s no way the (blank) could be sold for less than (blank).

The salesperson’s response is usually a lower price than the original asking price that was in play before. Now we have the salesperson’s first offer, which is what we wanted. Now all you need to do is pick up the phone and tell your “higher authority” what the salesperson has offered. At the end of the phone call you tell the salesperson that your “uncle” advised you to shop around. Then you apologize for you “higher power’s” behavior and explain to the salesperson that you like them and the product, but your uncle has advised you to shop around.

The salesperson will do one of two things, ask you to stay while they try to get you a better price, or they will just let you leave. If they let you leave, they probably don’t have much more negotiating room to work with. If this is the case, and you feel like you have been given a fair price, you should try to chip away at their counter offer. You do this by telling the salesperson that you think you can get your uncle to go along with the deal if he could just give you a little better deal. This usually gets you a little more knocked of the price. You can repeat this step as much as you like until you get the deal you want.

Before they began the negotiation, he heaped constant prays on her. She blushed and wondered if he had a deeper affinity. Finally, she said, “okay, enough with the manipulation efforts – let’s get down to business.” To which he replied, “I’ve been discussing business all along.” That’s when she said in a snarky tone, “the way you were carrying on, I thought you wanted to date me.” At that, he became a little crestfallen. That’s when he realized his prays had been perceived as manipulation. He had made a big mistake! Do you know how to avoid negotiation manipulation mistakes?

Continue reading and you’ll discover how to avoid and use manipulation in your negotiations.

Manipulations – good – bad – it depends:

Whether someone feels manipulated depends on their perspective. If you ask most people what the definition of manipulation is, they’ll state that it’s a negative act. It can mean to advantage oneself based on the skill applied to do so. It can also mean to address with skill a process or treatment – in that case, it’s neutral – neither negative or positive.

Before engaging someone in a negotiation, understand their perspective of prays, deference, and appreciation of one’s achievements. And be mindful not to be perceived as effusive. You don’t want your intent to be misperceived.

Manipulation Mistakes:

Some negotiators begin a negotiation unaware of how their actions are being perceived. Those individuals should acquire greater negotiation skills.

Smart negotiators are aware that every action may be scrutinized to disclose hidden intents. They look for body language signals to indicate indifference to offers and counteroffers.

Being unobservant opens the door to misperception. When you observe signals that indicate you’re being perceived as brownnosing or deceitful, those may be signs that you’ve wandered into the realm of making manipulation mistakes. Seek feedback as to how you’re being perceived and if necessary, clarify your intent.

Body Language Observance:

When detecting perceived manipulation through someone’s body language, there are a few signs to observe.

1. Head-cock to either side – This gesture indicates interest. It may be saying, where’s this going? Take note of the number of times the head moves from one side of the body to the other. That’ll indicate a greater intent to gain more insight about what’s being said. Look for other signs to add deeper meaning to head-cocking gestures. Smiles, along with interruptions, can lend to that insight.

1. Smiles – A smile doesn’t necessarily mean agreement. With perceived manipulation, a smile may indicate, let’s see how far he’ll go. Or, I don’t believe he’s saying that.

If you have doubt about a gesture’s significance, inquire about how it’s perceived. Some people find themselves on a slippery slope because they don’t recognize the first step. Don’t let that happen to you.

1. Interruptions – When someone interrupts you, they want to alter what they’re hearing. They may be asking you to cite your case differently for greater clarity.

The point is, they’re seeking more information. Take heed. They may be signaling hidden thoughts that states they’ve become more attuned to what you’re saying. Understand why that’s so.

Using Manipulation:

Manipulation can be an effective tool if it’s used correctly. To do so, understand the mindset of the other individual – and his boundaries about perceived effusiveness and lack of respect. Those boundaries will be the sweet spot to place your praise. Skirt those boundaries and you’ll venture into murky waters.

The best time to manipulate someone is when you slightly alter what they already believe to be true. It’s even better if you’ve established trust first. Thus, the more they see themselves in your reflection, the greater the opportunity for manipulation.

Please be aware not to abuse this technique. It can have deadly consequences in a negotiation. Always treat your opponent with the utmost respect. If you don’t intentionally manipulate someone towards harm, you’ll have greater negotiation outcomes… and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator